Often, the many troubles that people face in life are caused by a lack of understanding between them, the ability to put themselves in the place of another person and look at the world through his eyes. Many problems, conflicts and even wars could have been avoided if people knew how to understand, hear and, most importantly, feel each other. Then the world would become much cleaner, brighter and brighter.
Nature is still rich in amazing phenomena, and sometimes it is very generous to man. There are special, unique people who can acutely feel the experiences of others, penetrate their emotional world and become real witnesses of the emotional changes occurring in them. Such people are usually called ematopaths. Empathy is a gift that causes a storm of conflicting feelings. If some people with undisguised envy relate to those who know how to feel someone else's soul and see it from the inside, then others experience real horror from contact with them. So what is empathy? Is it a generous gift or heavenly punishment? Is it possible to develop it in a person?
Is it good to be an empath
Empathy, like everything else in the world, has its drawbacks and advantages. Do not think that empathic people get everything in life with ease, that, thanks to their abilities, they always achieve their goals and live happily ever after. Their existence cannot be called easy and cloudless for the following reasons:
- Empatia is directly related to the emotional state of people around. Empathic people often cannot control the emotional connection they create with others. They have to experience everything that others experience. And the emotions of people are far from always bright, pleasant and positive. This is a huge load on the nervous system, which has to work several times harder.
- It is known that when the nervous system suffers, the whole organism suffers. Empathic people are more likely than others to get sick. They have many problems with the cardiovascular system, and their immunity is often very weak. Empathic people recover more slowly after shocks, as the whole resource of the body goes to a constant struggle with unnecessary emotions and shocks.
It is worth highlighting the benefits that empathists have. They, like no one else, are versed in human psychology, if desired, they can manipulate people. Empaths also easily find a common language with everyone. They know what places to put pressure to achieve their goal. As a rule, empaths quickly reach career heights, get leadership positions and are able to lead a huge team. They easily avoid any conflicts, they see many problems and complications in advance. Their answers to questions appear faster than the questions themselves.
How to develop empathy
Scientists came to the conclusion that it is possible to develop empathy in yourself if you regularly and carefully train.
If a person has decided for himself that he needs to become emotionally closer to people, then it is worth taking note of what will be written below.
Concentration and mindfulness
The first thing that a person who wants to develop empathy must do is learn to listen. Often people are so inattentive to family, friends, acquaintances. Inattention gives rise to misunderstanding, quarrels, conflicts.
The ability to concentrate on the interlocutor and listen to him is an invaluable gift.
It is necessary to give the interlocutor the opportunity to speak out if a person feels that he needs this opportunity. It is important to maintain a conversation, ask questions, and gently and unobtrusively guide the interlocutor, showing that there is interest in his society and conversation.
Observation
Most of the people, being, for example, at a bus stop or in some public place, take out their gadget and head off into the virtual world. Instead of doing another equally important thing - observation, they are immersed in electronic space and further removed from reality.
It would be much more useful to watch people on the street, in shops, in lines, trying to put themselves in their place.
For example, a woman with a small child in her arms is waiting in line for a neurologist. She speaks extremely rudely with an elderly lady with a small grandson, to which the rest make a remark to her. You can try to figure out the reason for such behavior by putting yourself in the place of a young woman. It is important to ask yourself leading questions and immediately answer them from the perspective of a young woman.
Maintaining a dialogue with oneself is part of the work to develop empathy.
- What condition is the woman currently in?
- What exactly gives her condition?
- What are her motives?
- What happened before a woman came to a neurologist?
- What can be after taking?
Guessing
Movies and books will help develop empathy. At least 1 hour per day should be given to this exercise. It is recommended to choose some feature film with an unknown plot and start watching it, fully concentrating.
Each film has its own most intense point, a decisive moment. At such a moment, you should pause the film and try to predict the actions of the hero with the help of clarifying and leading questions, a logical chain and imaginative thinking, which will allow you to anticipate the outcome of the picture.
Each time it is necessary to complicate the films, choosing the most complex, ambiguous and twisted stories. Using the same principle, it is important to work with books.
Every day, a person will feel that his ability to predict actions, based on the internal state of the characters, is growing and strengthening.
Communication
The best way to become emotionally receptive is to communicate regularly with various people, preferably strangers.
Such communication will help to relax, teach you to find an approach and a common language in any situation and see a way out where it would seem to be gone.
It is useful to study strangers, talk with them, and then analyze the communication that has already taken place.
Communicating is necessary not only with strangers. First of all, you need to be able to communicate with yourself, to study yourself as a person and individuality, to learn how to correctly express your own feelings and emotions.
This is a fundamental skill without which one cannot become a good empathy. After all, one who does not understand himself is unlikely to understand the other.
Regular personal diary and a thorough analysis of everything that is written there will help in this.
Empathy is an extremely complex and responsible ability, requiring the investment of a huge amount of strength, potential and energy. That is why its development should be approached with caution.
